I have always thought that people may have a pre disposition to mental illnesses and some experiencies can trigger real hurtful disorders.
I’m a 47 seven years old artist and art teacher. When I was nine years old my family moved to another city. At the school I suffered a lot of teasing and verbal aggression from my new classmates . Perhaps that was the reason for knowing depressive feelings for the first time.
Since then, depression was a constant visit during decades. Adults were too busy and, in those times ,they dind ́t pay attention to children ́s mental health. You just needed to resist.
Suffering sexual abuse from fifteen to seventeen made things worse.
Depression, low self esteem, body insecurities, a deep feeling of loneliness…and now, some thing that (I knew later) they call Generalized
Anxiety disorder and Social Anxiety . Constant nervousness, guilt , insomnia
and fear. “A young lady with a complex personality ”, they say.
At the age of 25 I decided to get married from a vulnerable position,
so I lived five years of a bad marriage. In a bad marriage there can be physical sexual ,economic and psychological violence . And I had a very bad marriage.
Looking for happiness, I made the decision to get out of that r elationship and raise my baby daughther by myself.
Economic stress and responsabilities made worse my menthal issues .
Iwas highly efficient in my job . I was strong even though I was devastated inside. I was capable to speak in front of hundreds of people, but I suffered terrible anxiety in simple social situations.
In the path I learned that we don ́t have to accept menthal Illness as “ My personality”. We must look for help. Being in a gruoup therapy with others abused women was good for me, my friends and several psychologists helped me to be strong and to heal wounds .
Being with my family, art, tai chi practice, nature, diverse spiritual theraphys also helped.
And, in my case, taking a psychiatric medical treatment was a good decision. There are prejudices and we stigmatize psychiatry , it’s embarrassing to say
” I take pills ” and we hate the pharmaceutical industry . But I can share that
,for me , was a huge help for having the good mental health I currently have.
Every person has a story, their paths and fights. There are no victims, only people finding their own way to heal. Let’s not judge, let’s just be kind.
